Sophie is seventeen and about to make one of the most important decisions in her life – choosing a university program. Her parents are watching closely that her choice is reasonable and practical. They want to protect her from disappointment and unhappiness. Sophie has a dream which she has not shared with anyone. She tries not to think about it. It is distracting and in the way of her realistic and accessible goals.
According to Debbie Millman, one of the most established contemporary creative designers and successful entrepreneurs, before Sophie proceeds with her choices, she can benefit from a ‘dream’ exercise. For the last 12 years, Debbie has asked her students at the School of Visual Arts in New York City to take 30 minutes to describe the day exactly ten years from now. In the dream, everything they wish to have, do, be with is possible. It is exactly as they want it to be. From the morning to evening, every detail that they can imagine is to be laid out on paper.
I come across this exercise through Tim Ferris’ podcast interview with Debbie Millman. As soon as it is finished, I sit down and put on paper what my mind has to offer. The result surprises me. I have not thought or envisioned what I describe in my half-page essay.
I take this fantasy very seriously. But why, it is just a fantasy? We know what happens with fantasies. And who fantasizes anyway? It is silly.
Debbie’s students found that what they described on paper, they achieved. ‘It is magic,’ she laughs in the interview. She achieved her own goals that she listed in a bullet form as part of this exercise years ago. As a psychotherapist, I found my own explanation of the ‘magic’. What we dream of is what will unconsciously influence us in the important decisions we make in our lives. If what we really want is not made conscious, recognized and thought through, it will remain a powerful force, albeit unknown to us. If we ignore it and proceed with reasonable, realistic goals, when we achieve them we may still feel discontent. Even more, we may not be able to achieve those goals because that is not what we really, really wanted, in other words what our deep intelligence wanted for us.
The exercise gets this narrative out of the depths of our unconsciousness on page for us to read it and see it. If you do it today, you will be fascinated with what you find. It may trigger some fears and the need to dismiss it. But if you work through those fears and allow yourself to consider your dream, you will be moving one step closer to aligning with your inner self and becoming successful in the deeper sense of the word.